Firemen and Naps

Some days I literally cannot get out of bed. Not in the sad/emo/I-hate-my-life kind of way but in the I'm-literally-too-tired-to-get-up kind of way. Some days waking up at 4:30 (or earlier) is just NOT OKAY. Especially when your boss calls at 3 the day before and asks you to pick up a closing shift at another store because "if you're really serious about moving up you need to get your name out there to people in our district." Uhhhhhai. Thanks. I've been in retail forevahhhhh. I know the drill, holmes.

So then I end up taking the most epic mid-day naps and I still have to be in bed at a really early time to do it all over again. I don't have a life like at all. Sorry, friends. I'm not even that mad. I love sleeping so much. My bed is glorious.

My shower is getting re-tiled so roommates and I are forced to share (omg I wrote shart frist ahahahaha) a bathroom. Oh, man is my subconscious is super funny. It's totally not even that bad because it's just the shower but I still think that I'm super funny. Anyway at 5:30am last Sunday I woke up to my downstairs neighbors POUNDING on my door. My room is the farthest down the hallway and Batman and Mike's is like right by the door so I have no idea how it took them so long to wake up. I go to the door and Batman is already there talking to the craaaaaazy lady and who we only assume is her son. Who I feel sups sorry for. Well she is just all up in Batman's business (Batman is sporting a fluffy pink robe) telling us that there is a leak in the ceiling of her laundry room.

Let me pause for a moment and let me tell you about this lady. This summer, Batman put a mini potted garden on our main balcony. We had all sorts of delish veggies and pretty flowers. So she watered maybe like twice a week and she was really careful about it, not watering too much and she had drip trays under all the pots. Occasionally there would be LITERALLY a few drips down the edge of the balcony. And let me tell you what this lady has on her balcony. A PLASTIC KID'S PICNIC TABLE. And that's it. So homegirl called and complained about dripping water on her balcony probably like 10 (or more) times but we only got two official complaints for it. Which is insane. Because, hi, we live in SEATTLE and it rains and water is wet and no, your balcony is not covered or protected in any way. Water happens in Seattle. Allthetime.

So when this cray is all up in our business at 5:30 about a leak in her ceiling I can't help but laugh a little at all the karma that is happening at this moment. Also, like we're purposely somehow magically dripping water into her home. She is freaking out and yelling at us to turn off our water in the laundry room. She tries to bust in to check it out and we are all like HELLNO. So we go in and turn off the water to the washer and she is still freaking out about how our landlord won't answer (even though there is an emergency number on the voicemail) and about how she is going to call 911 about the leak. We recommended against it.

So I tried to go back to bed and about half an hour later just as I was about to fall asleep again, the is another pounding on the door (dun, dun, duuuuuuuuuun.)

It took me a little longer to get up but I decided to not let Batman handle the crazy lady on her own. So i open my door, with my pink sweatpants and sleep face aaaaaaand there stand 4 delicious firemen in my hallway. At 6 am. Checking out my laundry room. Real life. It was so close to my dream come true. But also not at all. So they're talking to us about the bathroom and laundry room and we tell them that there is another bathroom through the master (my room) and I get the pleasure of showing two of them through my bedroom to my bathroom. Oh, that's not weird. The cutest one is all up in my shower and comments, "these units are huge!" Thanks, yo, please come back later when I have makeup on. But I'm glad we took this awkward first step of you being in my bedroom.

It was maybe the craziest thing that's ever happened to me and I woke up some hours later and had to remember it was not a dream. But then I went into the hallway and smelled the faint hint of smoke and remembered how real that was. Damn, firemen.